Cultural Lying and the Age of Dishonesty
You’ve seen it on TV many times as a representation of what happens in real life: A person commits a heinous murder and hides the body in a closet or some other concealed place. The police gather an overwhelming amount of evidence but still need to find the victim’s body to be sure that justice will be done. They become certain that they know where the body is and do an illegal search or violate the murderer’s Miranda rights. The murderer has been clearly caught and justice is to be done, but wait: the evidence is thrown out because of a technicality! Such scenarios have caused the court to reconsider Miranda rights and other laws that are in place to protect our citizens but that have also allowed guilty parties to escape justice. Often, a guilty person being freed is said to have “gotten off on a technicality”.
Imagine this scenario with me: you’re driving down the road and the speed limit is 70 miles per hour. You know it’s 70, but you figure that you can get away with 82 before an officer would ticket you. Lo and behold, you get pulled over and ticketed for 12 miles over the limit. Clearly, you have broken the law. But how might some people (not you!) look to escape the consequences of breaking the law on a technicality?
- How do we know that the radar gun was working properly?
- Was the speed limit sign posted properly?
- Was the officer really able to hit my car with radar from that hiding point where he was parked?
- What excuse can I come up with that will change the officer’s mind? Boy, I sure do wish I had a woman in labor in the car.
- I am being targeted by the police because this is the third ticket I have received for speeding this month. There were 15 other cars going the same speed I was!
Let’s go a step further. What if you could claim innocence because the Officer did something wrong? Here are a few that might be used. I’m not guilty of speeding because:
- You scared me when you raised your voice to me while standing next to my car.
- You have coffee stains on your uniform.
- One of the lights has burned out on the police vehicle, so it wasn’t flashing properly.
- You asked for the registration and license instead of the license, registration, and insurance.
Enough with the illustrations. Let’s look at our children. I have noticed a pattern in some young children of becoming very proficient at telling stories in a way that they think will dismiss their own guilt. Example: Student throws food in the lunchroom. Teacher tells the student that she saw him throw food in the lunchroom and the student denies it. Student then tells parents that the teacher is wrongly accusing them. Parent wonders why child is being picked on (now even the parent is thinking this way). Parent comes to school to defend the student. Student is questioned by the Headmaster. Here is the conversation:
Headmaster to student: “Did you throw the food?”
Student: “No.”
HM: “You never threw the food?”
Student: “No.”
HM: “Did you touch the food?”
Student: “Well, I did touch it.”
HM: “How did you touch it?”
Student: Motions with hand like he is picking up the food and throws his hand in a forward direction and opens his hand as if to release the food into mid-air.
HM: “That’s throwing the food.”
Student: “No, I kind of tossed it.”
HM: “That’s throwing the food. You are lying.”
Student: “Everybody else at the table was throwing food. Why am I getting picked on?”
HM: “So, you threw the food?”
Student: “This teacher is always yelling at me.”
HM: “So, you threw the food? I have five other students that say you threw the food.”
Student: (reluctantly and with hanging head) “Yes.”
I regret to say that this type of scenario is not uncommon. The example above is taken from actual experiences that I have had, and I could give you others. I appreciate that the kids are critically thinking about these things as they analyze every jot and tittle, but they are not thinking like Christians! We are all just too much like the world in this way.
The Christian mind remembers that a half-truth is still a lie. The Christian mind reports his version of an incident correctly. That is, the Christian does not tell the story with an inaccurate context of events intended to distort the judgment of the hearer. To do so is just a subtle form of deception, which helps a guilty person escape the consequences of his actions or supports his denial of the truth. Jesus had severe words for those who focus on the letter of the law but miss out on the spirit of the law (Matt 23:23). He also had words for those who think that what people say or hear on the outside is all what matters. He said that even the sins of the mind make a man guilty before God (Matt 5: 28).
This kind of lying manipulates and twists the truth. In a 2004 survey by Deloitte and Touché, it was noted that 29% of the teens surveyed said “one has to bend the rules to succeed.” More alarming is that the same survey question came back at 20% the year before.
Allan Keyes’ book titled “The Post Truth Era – Welcome to the Age of Dishonesty” is another study of a culture (ours) that continues to slip and slide. Keyes says that people have become more skilled in lying than ever before. He says, “Even though there have always been liars, lies have usually been told with hesitation, a dash of anxiety, a bit of guilt, a little shame, at least some sheepishness.” Now, clever people that we are, we have come up with rationales for tampering with the truth so we can dissemble guilt-free.
Keyes goes on to say that when people behave in a way that conflicts with their values, they simply reconceive their values. That way, people can avoid thinking of themselves as unethical by redefining morality. Furthermore, the very term “lying” has been replaced with softer terms like “misspeak”, “spin”, or “poor judgment in the words that we used”.
I have observed another form of lying among young people that Keyes calls “recreational lying”. This is where a child completely fabricates stories and events to make himself more acceptable to his peers. Think about the implications of all of this: a society that is full of lies is a society in decline. So much rests on people being truthful and trustworthy in all areas of life.
Lying is nothing new to humanity – it started in the Garden of Eden – and it will continue until Christ comes again. However, we must confront this kind of thinking and have our minds renewed to think like Christ. In a day and age where a man asks what is meant by the word “is”, we will need to be on guard to make sure we are training our children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
First, however, we must be honest with ourselves. Have we as adults been honest with others and ourselves? Are there certain things in our lives that we are good at lying about, or are we excusing our sin based on some technicality? Certainly, we must remember that God sees it all and that there are consequences for every word we have spoken, deed we have done, and thought that we have had! Let’s get our hearts and minds right in all areas of our lives before we try to teach and model right living to our children. I am glad that we serve a patient and forgiving Father.
